i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
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I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
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You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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