Me. At least after what I've been through.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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