party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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