Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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