so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
