i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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