he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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