Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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