I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
