let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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