Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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