You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
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