The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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