I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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