Got a toothbrush?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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