Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
