Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
