On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
