Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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