I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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