wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When did angry sex become our thing?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
