But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
