Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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