I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
