STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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