Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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