this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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