you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
