I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
