i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
