Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
my poor anus
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
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