glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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