she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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