I wanna bring you to show and tell
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
God, I missed his penis.
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