i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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