It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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