we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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