if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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