Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
