The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
