I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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