Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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