weddingsv make me drug and hornr
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
