i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
