Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
