I'll bet she douches with gravy.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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