Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying