I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
