She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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