I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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